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Poverty in Grinnell
Jane, a Grinnell resident, has struggled with poverty her whole life, in part because of drug addiction and domestic abuse. Her story is unique, but is also indicative of a wider problem in Grinnell that organizations such as MICA are addressing.
by Brendan Mackie
Jane* (*name has been changed) works six to eight hours a day at the Westside Diner to support three children. Despite government-subsidized housing, child support and the help of Mid-Iowa Community Action (MICA), Jane lives paycheck to paycheck.
Jane is one of the 10 percent of Grinnellians who live in poverty. "I've struggled throughout my life," Jane said in an interview in the basement of the First Baptist Church before spring break. Her family development specialist, Mindy Clayton, and her uncle both accompanied her. "My entire life I've had to deal with huge hurdles," Jane said. "Whether it be family or friends or addiction or abuse." While Jane's story is unique, she has encountered problems common to many.
Poverty in Grinnell
Jane is 28. She has four children, the eldest of whom now lives with his father. In the last ten years she has lived in nine different places, mostly in Grinnell. For six months she was homeless, sleeping in her car or in friends' houses. "It's frustrating," she said. "Sometimes there are things that I just can't do. It's hard to accept that. My kids don't get to wear the designer clothes and the Nike shoes. I can't afford that. They're spoiled enough but they know they have to work for what they want."
Many of the long-term poor, like Jane, face complicated problems in getting back on their feet. "Most families are in poverty for a short duration," said Dick Stockner, MICA's director for Poweshiek County.
"It's something that comes along and leaves," usually caused by an unexpected and catastrophic event. "But what you'll find with most at-risk low income families that we're dealing with is that this is a long term enterprise because of extreme barriers to self-sufficiency." Drug abuse, a history of domestic violence and a lack of self-confidence can present seemingly insurmountable barriers.
Jane's is a success story. "This is my second year working. Before that I hadn't worked for seven years," she said. "So it helps, being out among the public and doing something, earning my keep."
According to the federal government's poverty guidelines, a four-person household like Jane's is living in poverty if the family's annual salary is below $20,000.
On a good day, Jane makes $30 in tips a day at the Westside Diner, but often comes home with less. She has to budget constantly. "Let's say I make $15 in tips and I need diapers, formula and food. So $15, what does that get me? It gets me either a can of formula, and maybe a loaf of bread," Jane said. "Or we can go diapers and some food. But it doesn't get all three. And that's where MICA comes in." MICA has a food pantry, which can help low-income families fill emergency gaps.
Drug addiction played role in poverty
Two and a half years ago, battling with an addiction to methamphetamines, Jane was forced to put three of her children into foster care. The eldest moved in with his father. Meth had taken over Jane's life. "I didn't care about anything. I love my kids, don't get me wrong, it's not that I didn't love them," Jane said.
"It's not that I didn't care for them; I fed them, clothed them. But I couldn't be there for them. It was a hard realization to come to. I was at the point where I had nothing. The only thing my life consisted of was drugs."
Jane started using meth seriously when she was 20. With an alcoholic mother, Jane was often left alone while growing up and fell victim to peer pressure. For Jane, drugs were an escape from life's disappointments. "I used meth to make it all go away," she said. "To make the loneliness go away, to numb the pain and the crap that life has handed me."
Jane got treatment and has been clean for two years. "I think I knew I needed to change for several years before I did," she said. "I just needed enough courage to step up to myself and look at myself and say, ?It's time.'"
Domestic violence made recovery more difficult
Jane had to shake both her addiction to meth and an unhealthy relationship with the father of one of her children. "It's an addiction, in a way. You get beat on and treated like crap and talked down to for so long that you just think that that's all you are and that's all you can do and you're scared to get out because on several occasions he could've killed me," she said. "I didn't have anywhere to run. I had a choice of being in a women's shelter, but I couldn't do that. It was degrading to me, maybe."
According to a Domestic Violence Alternatives/Sexual Assault Center (DVA/SAC) counselor who has to remain anonymous because of DVA/SAC's confidentiality policy, "domestic violence can often be harder to escape for poor women who must rely on their partners for financial support."
"When women try to set off on their own in a country in which the minimum wage is not enough to get by," it is often impossible for them to "get an apartment, get a job, get a car and support their kids," the counselor said.
The economic aspect of domestic violence "is one of the most insidious kinds of abuse because it's too difficult a lot of times to express it. It's hard to say, ?My husband who makes all the money won't give me any.' People will often take that with a grain of salt."
Jane could not stop her children from witnessing her abuse. "You can't shelter them from it at all. If you're in the other room and he's beating you, or if you're standing right in front of them and he's beating you, you're not sheltering them from it," she said.
"It's something we have to deal with still. Especially with my daughter, to know that it's not appropriate that men treat her like that. And to my boys, it's not appropriate that men not treat women like that. Hopefully they won't be too affected by it."
According to the DVA/SAC counselor, 1.3 million children witness domestic violence every year, 90 percent of children are aware of the violence and 30 to 70 percent of batterers abuse the children as well. But even when children just witness the abuse, they have behavioral, social and emotional problems more often than children from healthy families.
Jane says she would not have gotten sober without a strong support system. Her uncle plays a large role. "He helped me understand that I'm an addict and he's been with me the whole entire time." He's also Jane's ride. "He deserves an award," she said.
Her family development specialists from MICA, Mindy Clayton and Rachel Porath, help too, both as emotional support and as advocates who can refer her to social service agencies and speak to people on her behalf.
Still, many people close to Jane battle addiction. "It's hard to support family members and friends who use. It's hard to point yourself away from that. Most of the family that I'm close to, they're all alcoholics and addicts."'
With MICA's help, Jane has become a success story
These days, Jane has a stable job, is off meth, and feels in control of her life. "I don't really feel like using anymore. I just have people who I can call. People who I know can help me through that."
Jane and three of her children have been living in the same apartment for a year now. She feels proud that she now provides a good example to her children, and that she can give them a stable home. "Knowing that they can grow up and choose a different life than I did is inspiring."
Although much of Jane's life is difficult, she still keeps some time for herself. "My kids now go to their fathers' every other weekend. So that's a big help. I have at least a couple hours after I get home from work to do what I need to do for myself. You know, if I need to just sit down in a corner and cry somewhere I can do that without upsetting my children. Working, although it's stressful, is time for myself, too. It makes me feel productive."
Yet some days Jane gets frustrated. "There will be days when I will be angry and say to myself, ?Why does everything have to happen to me?' This person gets everything handed to them, they have this sweet life and I'm angry, jealous and resentful. But I think that everybody's different. Everybody's good at something."
Jane wants to go to college to study psychology. She wants to be able to help out other addicts. The stress now, however, is too much. "It's hard to deal with, knowing that I had potential to be more, that I still have potential to be more, but it would a huge struggle for me right now to even try to attempt to go to college. I was thinking of going back to college just last semester and at this point I think that my life's just too chaotic."
Yet despite these frustrations, Jane is able to see how far she's come.
"Knowing that you can't provide for your children is horrible. It brings you way way way down. Then you start feeling sorry for yourself, making excuses for yourself, and that just doesn't work. You always have to step out of that," she said. "You call your friend ? [and say], ... I don't have any formula, can you get me enough formula to get me through tomorrow so I that I can get diapers, so that I can feed my kids?' And you always have food. You always have those crappy vegetables in your cupboard but you can always find a way. It might not be a gourmet meal but your children are fed. They have food in their stomach. It might not be what they wanted, but that's life."
Sidebar: By the numbers
9,871: individuals were assisted through MICA's Women, Infants and Children (WIC) prorgram in 2005
495: families avoided utility shutoff with the help of MICA's Low-Income Home Energy Assistance Program
112,570: pounds of food were distributed by MICA in Hardin, Poweshiek, and Story Counties in 2005
371: children were enrolled in Head Start programs
$112,504: in checks was distributed by WIC for the purchase of fresh fruits and vegetables at Farmers' Markets
30: families were supported towards self-sufficiency in 2005 through MICA's Project Home Mission
3,527: hours were spent volunteering at community projects with Service Learners, an after-school program
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